A Heart Awakened: How the Election of a New Pope Opened My Eyes

If you had asked me years ago what I thought about religion, I would’ve likely been the first to challenge it often harshly. I’ve never been one to sugarcoat my views, and for a long time, religion felt more like a cage than a comfort. I was raised in a Catholic household, yes, but not in a traditional sense. We didn’t attend church regularly, nor did we follow doctrine with devotion. Still, we honoured the big days Good Friday meals of white meat only, Easter celebrations, and Christmas traditions. But even those felt more cultural than spiritual.

As I grew older, the cracks in my belief system deepened, and I drifted into atheism. After facing wave after wave of personal loss, grief, and soul-wrenching questions, I eventually found myself drawn toward spiritualism a path where I began to make peace with the unseen, the felt, the deeply intuitive. Spiritualism offered me a way to explore life, death, and the beyond without dogma. It met me where I was: broken open but seeking something real.

And yet, over the past couple of weeks, something unexpected stirred in me.

I watched intently as the Vatican prepared for and carried out the election of the new Pope. I watched the rituals, the centuries-old traditions, the sea of people in St. Peter’s Square, the prayers, the humility, and the reverence. I felt a stirring that surprised me: not a conversion, but a deep appreciation. Something about witnessing the unity, the hope and the responsibility wrapped in sacred ceremony deeply moved me.

I never expected that.

The Vatican, for all its flaws and criticisms, revealed itself to me not just as an institution but as a symbol of continuity, reflection and collective faith. I began to see the Pope not just as a figurehead of a religion I had long since abandoned, but as a human being carrying the weight of millions’ hopes, beliefs and prayers.

It made me reflect on my own judgments the walls I built to protect myself from being hurt or misled. It made me realise how far I’ve come, from ridiculing others for their beliefs to respecting the deeply human need to belong to something greater.

This isn’t a declaration of conversion. It’s a declaration of awakening.

I still walk a spiritual path guided by personal truth, but I do so now with a more open heart. I can honour my roots without feeling bound by them. I can look at others’ faiths with eyes that seek understanding rather than critique. I can watch a Pope be elected and, instead of rolling my eyes, feel tears build in mine.

Because in the end, maybe it’s not about the label Catholic, spiritualist or atheist. Maybe it’s about the journey. How incredibly beautiful it is when something cracks us open just enough to see a little more light than we did yesterday.